The “Best Possible Outcome Under the Circumstances”
When I meet with prospective clients for the first time, I almost always hear them say that all they want is a “fair” agreement. Nobody ever wants to take advantage of their spouse or achieve [...]
Why I Require Disclosure of Separate Property
Under the Equitable Distribution Law in New York, only “marital property” is distributed between spouses in the event of a divorce. Marital property is defined as any property acquired from the date of the marriage [...]
Who is the “Custodial” Parent? Part 2
Tony and Mara never married. However, they lived together for a while and had a son in 2007. When they separated, their son, Alix, went to live with Mara. Tony was very successful, financially. By [...]
Who is the “Custodial” Parent?
Nowadays most couples I work with want some type of shared parenting so that each parent spends a significant amount of time with the children each week. I often see couples who divide time with [...]
What’s Your BATNA? The Legal vs. the Emotional Divorce – Part 2
In divorce mediation, when someone examines his or her BATNA (Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement) they are looking at both the best and worst outcomes if their dispute were to be decided by a [...]
The Limits of “Self-Determination”
I recently worked with a couple who wanted a divorce as soon as possible. Unfortunately, the wife was not working, had no means of supporting herself, was attempting to obtain disability benefits and the husband [...]
“Equitable” Does Not Mean “Equal”, Part II
In Part I of Equitable Does Not Mean “Equal”, I discussed how a couple whose financial goals were very different during their marriage reached an agreement when they ended the marriage despite having different ideas [...]
Why Mediate Your Divorce?
Just ask Joe and Suzanne This is the true story of Joe and Suzanne, who were married in 1986, separated in 2003 and were still battling in court in 2012. This is what happened. Although [...]
Emotional vs Legal Divorce
In my mediation practice I often encounter couples who arrive at my office in different places emotionally. One of them is ready to end the marriage while the other is still hoping it can be [...]
Disempower Your Ex-Spouse
In the past two blogs I addressed a law in New York that provides for the revocation upon divorce of dispositions to a former spouse under a will as well as beneficiary designations found in [...]